I followed Artimus Pyle after a Lynyrd Skynyrd show
He ended up at a NAMBLA meeting
I knocked at the door and Artimus Pyle answered
I gave him pictures of your kid because I hate him

[Chorus:]
I gave NAMBLA pictures of your kid, Artimus Pyle, Artimus Pyle, Artimus, Artimus, Artimus Pyle, Artimus Pyle, Artimus Pyle, Artimus, Artimus, Artimus Pyle

The next day there was a line at your door
Artimus Pyle was going back for seconds
Your kid had a lock of Artimus beard in his ass
Your kid made Artimus Saturday night special

[Chorus]

Lynyrd Skynyrd used to be your favorite band
Until Artimus had your kids dick in his hand