This is my way of life
It's like a non stop contradiction
In a faded past lies this conception
A synthetic void Scaved into my mind
A murderous feeling

Imagine a falling star holding all the wishes of a child
Burns to nothing in front of you
A noveled fiction (A written Addiction)
A lust for passion
The bacterial infection (To this Reality)
Has choked the scent of my skeletal profile
(The facts of my nature)
EAT MY BRAIN TO GET A PIECE OF MIND
[chorus:]
This is not the life I asked for
These are not the things I stand for
This is not the life I asked for
This is not the person I am
Did I mention my sickness
Its all in my head
Mark my words
Cause I have none left
Preserve my memories in Phormaldahyde
EAT MY BRAIN TO GET A PIECE OF MIND
[chorus:]
This is not the life I asked for
These are not the things I stand for
This is not the life I asked for
This is not the person I am2. Holy BloodI'm now
riding down on these holy words
I'm kinda scared just by thinking
how much hate it takes to eliminate a man
how much hate it takes to eliminate you
Just tell me wheres the fucking god damn love
Close to you
close to the above
kill me then, I'll be grateful
That redemption from this quiet dream
showed me the now and the when
my life will take form
for the second time
now it's time
to believe in this
now it's time
to believe in me
Lets all burn across
Non-existent chaos
I'll sell you my pride
to forever lose my sensitive side
forgetting about feelings
choking on my own breathing
look up to the sky
Stare into the stars
look closer
my soul is missing
now it's time
to believe in this
now it's time
to believe in me
[chorus:]
At least I'll try for me I'll die
can't blame it on my inner coward
who tries to find my loss of power
My mind hates me thats why I love it that much
darkness to breathe, darkness to feed
my emptiness, pain and suffering
[bridge:]
INSANITY
believes in me
This drop of blood on my hands
DEFINES MY LIFE
Paint me upon the canvas of hypocracy
So I can stare back into my eyes like you all do
So please let me find my way back
out of the blurred portrait of ignorance3. Soldier Of EmptinessSo much pressure
So much waste of time
This is a story that we've all tried
I'm just thinking I dunno how to deal with my own
MORTAL SINS
I'm still living through this emptiness
Dream of my will
I cannot change this
Restricts misconstues
This pride bearing wall
Its always raining over my consciousness
Its always raining over my regrets
[chorus:]
I am the soldier of emptiness (of Emptiness)
Its just a stalling of time (before)
Its too late
(I don't believe in compromise)
Cause everything is fake
Everything is a fucking lie
I know for all this time that people guided me
But I don't know where I am
I've created my own picture of demise
To erect the opposition of our each hope
I remember now I am everything
The Alpha, The Omega, The God who created God
To be assured to the end
But then I'll die constrained
[chorus:]
I am the soldier of emptiness (of Emptiness)
Its just a stalling of time (before)
Its too late
(I don't believe in compromise)
Cause everything is fake
Everything is a fucking lie4. Soul ReflectionMy conscience is far
far beyond your strength
An imitation of a perplexed existence
Your words they cannot save me
hypnotized by a fear so dark
Look deep into my eyes and see my real side
No wonder an image so pure and yet so fake
together at the same time
Contortion in no sense
exhumed by corruption
I hold the key
I am the key to my existence
[chorus:]
My Burning Desires
Are frozen inside of my time
I'm striving for someone
that is lost
Smothered in ashes
I'm holding confined to this stride
I'm trying for something
that does not exist
Free from my innocence
exert from my subconscience
A test tube morality
conjured from my impurities
A person (So perfect)
On the outside (So real)
But so fake (and so pure)
unpure on the inside
this illusion of life inside my mind
is a burning contrast of the person I fucking hide
I want to see I want to believe
but I can't seem to break free from me
I want to stay I want to be alone
starring deep into my Soul Reflection
[chorus:]
My Burning Desires
Are frozen inside of my time
I'm striving for someone
that is lost
Smothered in ashes
I'm holding confined to this stride
I'm trying for something
that does not exist5. The Art Of Self AfflictionBelieve in something
Or bleed out of Nothing
Anyways
My dreams will be against
The same pain as always
But I can't take it or deal with this anymore
And when theres sorrow on my mind I push it
To the extreme
And now theres something wrong with my vision
I cannot see
and inside my mind
There's a constant fight
(a constant fight)
(against the end)
and against my own reasons
[chorus:]
Only in darkness I can be
I'm blurring my own mind
Cause I don't allow my eyes to see
For eternity I will be blind
I feel this constant pain once again
And once again I'm finding myself
Fighting myself using self inflictions
Its the only way to find
Answers to my questions
[bridge:]
Help me, Blame me
Make me, Break me
Heal me, Hate me
Love me, Spite me
Kill me
Help me by killing my thoughts
[chorus]
Only in darkness I can be
I'm blurring my own mind
Cause I don't allow my eyes to see
For eternity I will be blind6. Kiss My Dead MindAt this rate I'll be dead before you die
And I'll be gone before you cry
Don't try to love me anymore
Cause I've bled all I'm sorry for
I can't remember your name
Cause its turned black my old smile that I've kept locked inside
And I can't remember this place
So obscure it's killing me
I'll be the one
to help you feel it
To Feel the fire burn
You'll be the one
To help me heal it
Heal all the spineless liars
Kiss my dead mind
Still wanna save me
You'll have to take on
You heard you want to save me
You'll have to kill yourself
It'll eventually grow on me for
I tried
But I won't be the last one sacrificed
I won't
[chorus:]
Tonight I'll die upon your lies
But I wont feel it
Taking back my insanity
It's time to close your eyes
You won't break me
But I wont be the last one saved twice again
I wont
A voice so pure
It's like a sixth sense
Telling all your superficial intents
Kiss my dead mind
I'll end up running I'm so scared
To break into my head
Into into my mind
But I wont be the last one enslaved....instead
Tonight I'll die upon your lies
But I wont feel it
Taking back my insanity
It's time to close your eyes
Give me a reason a reason to breathe
You've killed me as always
and now we will meet
It's time to close your eyes
Your eyes.....
your eyes.....
your eyes.....7. Through The Eyes Of The PastSurprise Surprise
Here comes the overrated past
The acquisition of my morals
I can't look at my reflection anymore
I can't look at you
Cause your so beautiful
Anyways we're all part of our sins
Cause everything everytime
Every little piece is fucking related
Oh Fuck I wanna sin so bad
I wanna touch your insanity
I wanna stare at my dirty past straight in the eye
And relive all the mistakes
Like the same loss of control
My sane just slipped
Take me away from this
Take me away from me
[chorus:]
Drawing the earth in the palm of your hand
Consuming the part of the infinite end
Set off the alert of this oncoming storm
We'll be covered in dirt
We'll wake up and eat worms
I'll never repent........
I hate to love my hate
Fight me Spite me
Or let me die
I'm stuck inside this mind-built prison
Made out of morals
Made out of regrets
[chorus:]
Drawing the earth in the palm of your hand
Consuming the part of the infinite end
Set off the alert of this oncoming storm
We'll be covered in dirt
We'll wake up and eat worms
The pure is so beautiful
The oncome edge in sadness
What direction should I take
What choices should I makeThanks to smithdrum@hotmail.com for sending these lyrics.